“Help! I’ve been held hostage by the Russians…” Naomi texts her friend late at night on a Saturday night. No, we haven’t gotten ourselves embroiled in a cross cultural post-Glasnost imbroglio. We’re dining at Romance, a Russian restaurant on a quiet corner in Kingsford. But more on our hostage taking later. Allow me to rewind to 7.30pm that night when The Second Wife, Gravy Beard, Naomi, Mr NQN and I entered Romance. Open just two nights a week it’s said to be totally and utterly Russian and a great experience to boot – if you understand that your main will hit your table at about 10.30pm and they do things their way. As I step in I am suddenly transported back to my teenage years with my Russian best friend. She and her family would take me out to Russian dinners at places just like this. The Second Wife tells me “Our booking tonight is for 7.30pm because that’s the earliest sitting” and by now the restaurant is in full swing.
The sight that greeted us as we walked in
Just like I remember, there are cold plates of colourful food set on the table. It looks like a bountifully dressed Christmas table and our eyes widen with excitement. And did I mention that these are just the cold entrees? There are hot entrees to come as well as a main as well as drinks and shots of vodka and all of this for $65 a person (and it’s assumed that you will have the set menu unless you specify so when booking). If you order a la carte, entrees are on average $14.90 and mains $24.90 and $29.90. Jugs of drink are a steal at $5, shots of vodka with a thin slice of lemon $10 and complimentary jugs of raspberry cordial are replenished throughout the night by the young waiters in civilian clothing.
Gravy Beard points out Jack White also tends the bar and waiters here
Salmon and blini platter $19.90
We dive right in and try the entrees. I start with the item that I know I will like the best. The plate has sheets of folded smoked salmon, a bowl of fat caviar peals and thinly rolled blinis spread with Philadelphia cream cheese. It’s lip smackingly good and I love the little salty bursts of caviar on my tongue and the portions of each component generous, particularly the smoked salmon and caviar.
Eggplant wraps $14.90 for 8
Deceptively simple looking, these moist, soft eggplant discs are filled with tomato and garlic and pack a flavour hit.
Salad Olivier $14.90
The Salad Olivier is a fortress of potato salad with mayonnaise, egg and peas and was one of my favourite items from my teenage years when I used to go over to my friend’s house and her mum would feed me this. I prefer mine with more dill in it though but this is a good version. Apologies for the photo quality, in the rush we forgot to get a close up photo of this.
Cold meat platter: baked chicken roulade and classic roast beef $14.90
The chicken roulade is moist and the roast beef is good although nowhere near as exciting as the rest of the dishes.
Meat salad $14.90
Some dishes diverge slightly from what is on the menu. On the menu as a chicken salad we instead receive a meat salad which are slices of cold roast chicken and beef sliced thinly with apple, celery and mayonnaise. It’s simple but absolutely delicious and a favourite of the table.
Baked fish $14.90
This dish was a little alarming in appearance and we poked and prodded this before the very friendly owner came over to explain what it was. It’s minced fish baked with herbs and tomato and set with an aspic with carrots and beetroot. It’s actually one of my favourite dishes but then again I love gefilte fish so if you’re also a fan you’d probably like this.
Seafood salad $14.90
The seafood salad has pieces of calamari, mussels, octopus and fish with some crumbed and fried pieces and some simply poached. It’s dressed in a light vinegary dressing.
Seledochka Po-Russky $14.90
The Russian Style herring which has people divided is delicious. I love pickled herrings and unmistakebly Herring taste and when it’s served with onion rings it is salty and flavoursome.
Salad
In my excitement, I forgot to try this salad but it was a plain garden salad.
Russky Roznoso Platter $6.90
The Russian style salted and marinted pickles also prove popular and I particularly like the cucumber dill pickle.
Mushroom salad
The mushrooms (shiitake) are plump, slippery and redolent with garlic.
We sit back convinced that we’re now completely full but then a quick glance at the menu tells us that we not only have our mains to come but also hot entrees!
Raspberry cordial
Blini crepes with mushrooms $7.90
The first hot entree is the Blini crepes presented Moneybag-style and tied with a blanched spring onion. It’s filled with a creamy stroganoff style mushroom and beef filling and is comfortingly good.
Stuffed Chicken Maryland with”Danniki” (fried potato patties) $19.90
The Stuffed Chicken Marylan looks enormous is a most curious dish. It is actually chicken meat that has been minced and then stuffed back into the skin. None of us can figure out how it’s done as the skin remains intact on the outside yet the inside is most certainly minced. In any case, it’s great and served with the potato patties which resemble thick potato pancakes, it’s sealing our fate. Yes we are full – resoundingly so.
There’s some action on the dancefloor as the live music starts up (and it’s loud) and there’s a 60th wedding anniversary party in the corner. Then after the anniversary couple’s dance there’s plenty of dancing action as adults and kids dance to Russian and English music. A group of kids attempt a Cossack dance on the small dancefloor. There’s certainly a feel of being at a wedding with the huge meals, multiple courses and dancing and our fellow diners are in a very convivial mood.
Vodka shots
Russian Submarine $24.90
A little shot of vodka and we’re about to wave the white flag of surrender when our mains arrive. Grilled salmon wrapped in fine zucchini slices with “green sauce”. The salmon is lovely and tender – miraculously so as everyone in the restaurant is served at the same time adding to the wedding like atmosphere and the fact that the mains are served alternate style. Gravy Beard takes a peek into the kitchen later and spies only three women in there churning out a huge number of meals. The green sauce is a wonderful creamy basil sauce which goes so well with the salmon and zucchini.
Fillet “Romance” Tenderloin beef eye fillet $29.90
Now the bit where most weddings fall short is the beef. It’s often chewy and horrible as a result of being cooked twice for a large number of people and when this is set down in front of us, there’s a trail of blood on the side of the sauce. It doesn’t look promising. However it is actually a pretty good piece of beef. Better than anything we’ve ever been served at a wedding and is actually tender the whole way through. Gravy Beard and Mr NQN are very impressed at the tender, gristle free steak.
Potatoes
The potatoes on the side are garlicky and delicious with an almost sticky texture.
After our mains it’s about 11pm and the band plays the sultry Still Got the Blues. This is the cue for the kids to leave the dance floor and the couples take to the stage. There’s one couple who are going for the most amorous title with a very graphic, firm and long lasting bottom grab that has been burned into my retina. The kids are sugared up (presumably from the cordial) and do leap frogs over each other. We take this as a cue to leave as we don’t have any room for dessert. We ask for the bill several times and finally ask the owner who seems surprised and a touch disappointed that we are leaving. He asks us to stay and have some tea or coffee or more vodka and we decline as we have to go. He promises our bill and 40 minutes after we originally asked, we get the bill (during which time Naomi sends the ominous SMS to her friends). Only one table has actually left during this evening as everyone else is still going strong- until 1am. Yes those Russians sure know how to have a good time!
So tell me Dear Reader, are you a night owl or a day bird?
Romance
36 Gardeners Road, Kingsford, NSW
Open: Friday 7pm-12am
Saturday 7pm-1am (live music on Satruday night)
Bookings are essential
Seats 130
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43 Comments | Add your own
I am a definate night owl… although having to wake up early when my toddler wakes up is changing that.
This place sounds like a great night out, i feel sorry for whoever the designated driver is, missing out on the vodka shots… also i was dissapointed you didn’t nab any dessert, I have never really had any Russian food and would be interested to see what they have for sweets there.
I love the opening line to this post! Haha
I used to be a night owl, but now I’m exclusively dinural.
I’ve never really enjoyed Russian food, especially the cold entrees…not quite sure why. The Russian Submarine looks good though, and I could eat a plateful of those potatoes!
It looks as though you all had a really good feed- so cheap too!!
I am definitely a nana in a young body- I much prefer lunches to dinners out, and breakfast is my favourite meal.
I was a night owl through uni but work has turned me into a day bird
Hahaha at your hostage story! And the Jack White doppelganger! It sounds like fun though, the place does look so wonderfully Russian.
Oh my goodness this is a feast for sore eyes! And yes that is Jack White tending the tables hahaha!
How do you do it Lorraine, finding these treasure troves and then actually sitting down to consume all that food? I sometimes get full just reading about the courses Lol.
I’ve never eaten at a Russian restaurant before but a good friend of ours used to make a delicious Salad Olivier which we would devour. Being of Italian heritage, I definitely am a night owl and when visiting relatives in Italy, it’s not unusual to sit down to the evening meal as late as 10.30pm consuming abundant courses and then talking,laughing and sometimes singing until the early hours of the morning.Italians, after all invented ‘La Dolce Vita’!
This looks like it was such a fabulous time! What a gorgeous meal spread, and at $65 a head for the set menu, it’s a real bargain!
Those blini with the stroganoff filling sound wonderful! It looks like a fun atmosphere too.
wow nice find, I’m always around this area and I’ve never seen this restaurant before!
This is great! We pass this restaurant every week on the way back home from our grocery shopping, and I’ve always wondered what it would be like. It sounds like something to bring a large group to…and I’m sure with a couple of the vodka shots, I’ll very easily turn from a day bird into a night owl.
Time for a pilgrimage to Sydney, I think! That looks amazing, and evokes memories of my childhood when my Oma would take me to visit her Russian neighbour. We’d sit in her small kitchen playing cards and she would feed me these sweet dumplings that were just amazing.
What an impressive feast, and not a bowl of borscht to be seen!
I’m a sad case of a night owl AND day bird, so I’m surely developing eye wrinkles before my time. I am slowly turning into a day bird, hopefully one day I’ll learn to get to bed at a reasonable hour. Damn internet.
looks like a great fun place to dine. Russians sure know how to eat and party!
Awesome Russian dishes here! Reminds me of my brother’s wedding which was at a Russian restaurant in Chicago – I think that party was till 4am, definitely night owls
Where do you find all of these cool restaurants? You are the best at seeking out fun place to eat! =)
Wow look at all of that food! Funny how they were so disappointed about you leaving – I guess the Russians just love partying on til the early hours of the morning!
WOooow thats a long dinner! And so much food! Incredible! I dont think we have a russian restaurant in Melbourne. Interesting! Shame there was no room for dessert as I would have liked to see what they would offer!
lol. that’s hilarious! one of my best friend’s from high school is also russian, and her dad just celebrated a birthday at Romance – i heard it was quite the night! i always wondered about this place, good to know the food is good… hehe… gotta love the russians
this looks like an amazing meal!
Oh I wanted to try this famous Russian restaurant when I am in NY, but I don’t think I’ll be able to…so sad! I really wanna try that gorgeous Russian submarine!
Ramance reminds me of the Russian place Alexander Petrovsky took Carrie out for their first date
What an enormous quantity of food!!! Much of it looks delicious, but I couldn’t copre with it all, I am sure. LOL at the butt grabbing couple. For the record, I am a day bird, and fade rapidly at night.
Oh… what a great greeting!!! I love the look of the Blini crepes with mushrooms too… yum!
The name Romance itself is so different, loved all the dishes, what a delicious spread!
you’ve just given me a lesson on russian food, I actually didn’t know a whole lot till i read your post. anyway, food here looks fantastic and there sure is a lot of it for what you pay for
have to say i’m a night owl. i actually need to remind myself to go to work in the mornings to wake up…
Hi Tara-Ahh yes I’d imagine that would change the night owl quite a bit! Ahh yes I don’t think we had too many! We didn’t realise they were included in the price until the end!
Hi Tiffany-Hehe it was really quite comical at the same time
I used to be much worse too! Yes the submarine was really good-and so moist! A miracle for function style catering!
Hi sandra-I know, it was so reasonable given the amount of food we ate! Hehe that sounds so cute!
Hi Steph-Yes that was the same as me! It was quite a magical night indeed full of rock stars
Hi Trisha-Yes we were so impressed!
I know it’s freaky isn’t it! 
Hi Matilda-Haha it’s a hard life isn’t it! Hehe I love it! Ahh yes that is definitely the way of life that I’d like to lead. But other things get in the way *sigh*
Hi Faith-We had a ball
I know, it was amazingly good!
Hi Arwen-They were really good although the salmon blini stole my heart
Hi Howard-Thanks! The Second Wife is a great finder of these places
Hi Karen-Oh very cool! Yes I suppose only being open 2 nights a week and the other nights for functions it’s a bit “mysterious” as you never know when it’s open but I loved it. Absolutely great for a large group!
Hi Jess-Yes! Aww what a lovely childhood memory!
Hi Conor-Yes we were surprised that there wasn’t any borscht! :O Oh wow both! Hehe I know what you mean though
Hi Simon-They sure do!
Hi 5 Star Foodie-Ahh sounds like a fantastic night! I’d love to go to a Russian wedding or a wedding at a Russian restaurant. Although I think I pretty much did on Saturday night!
Hi Brianna-Hehe I have great friends and readers!
Aww thankyou!
Hi Jacq-I know, it was quite sweet really
Yes I guess so! I’ll remember that for next time and have a nap!
Hi Esz-I know but time flew as we were having fun
Aww really? What a shame! It said “Cake of the day” which would have been good to try but there was no room at all in our tummies 
Hi Betty-OH really? How funny is that?
I don’t think you could have bad night. Unless of course you don’t like the concept itself. Everyone is very jovial and happy there.
Hi veggiebelly-It was a fantastic one with fantastic company!
Hi Sophia-Awww no, what a shame but you tried XLB YAY!!
Hi Ellie-haha really! Haha the late night date where they were the only diners?
Hi Cakelaw-It was huuuge! Hehe I found a way of coping
It was so graphic and his fingers wandered like a frisky spider! 
Hi Anita-Hehe thanks! I adore blinis and these were fantastic
Hi Parita-Yes it’s a lovely name for a restaurant isn’t it!
Hi Panda-Ahh cool! I love it I have to say and yet it’s one of those cuisines I don’t have often enough. Definitely! Hehe that is so funny!
Ha ha, held hostage by Jack White and his cohorts – hilarious. That’s a crazy amount of food, though I love the sound of the blini crepes…!
Definitely a nightowl! What a fabulous array of food – how do you manage to find these intriguing places to eat? It’s like stepping into a time portal and finding yourself in the twilight zone!
Fun looking place and ROFLMAO at the SMS! Did her friends get freaked out?
This brings back memories of a trip to Russia many moons ago. Agreed the food is very tasty and indeed best reserved for Winter when servings that size are warranted. Belt expansion not optional, instead mandatory.
when i think of the word “romance” and associate it with food, absolutely nothing russian comes to mind. i guess i haven’t had the right russian food, because this stuff looks great.
Hee hee oohh there aren’t that many Russian rests are there? But this place looks pretty good! and lulwut at the bottom grab 0_0
and boo at the 40min wait for the bill :S
i really wish i had stumbled upon this blog when i was in sydney…
you should definitely submit some of your photos to http://www.donteatthatyet.com. their goal is to create a visual restaurant review site similar to tastespotting
Hi Tina-I know! The night couldn’t have gotten funnier! They were great *drools*
Hi Moya-I have fantastic friends like The Second Wife! I know isn’t it just?
Hi Aubrey-Hehe I don’t know! I should have asked but the police didn’t arrive
Hi Mike-Ah wonderful! Yes I can imagine that the food has fuelled many a cold Russian winter!
Hi grace-LOL I suppose not really! I mean perhaps France or Italy!
Hi FFichiban-There are a few in Sydney and I think I’ve been to them all
I know, that bottom grab was so…graphic! I wish I’d taken a pic 
Hi Jessie-Aww thankyou!
I will check that site out, thankyou! 
wooo this is so interesting! I’ve talked to my friend straight after reading about this restaurant, planning to pay a visit!
Hi Yas-Ahh very cool! I’d love to know what you think of it
woah all that for $65? that is crazy! i’ve never tried russian food but it looks very yummy! =]
This looks delicious – even at 8am in the morning
Fabulous site!
x
I am officially hungry!! LOL I’ve never been to a Russian restaurant, but having a friend at school who was half-Russian, her mum used to make some yummy food for us when it was my friend’s birthday!
Thanks 
This is yet another place to add to my list of restaurants to check out when I have money!
Hi K-I know! Isn’t it great? It was delicious and we had a great time!
Hi friendinfashion-Thankyou so much!
x
Hi Liv-Hehe! Mmm yes that reminds me of my friend’s mum! Great stuff! You’re more than welcome!
this is the way the Russians celebrate everywhere, in Melbourne try a place coled Matryoshka even more food the price is about $70 a head
there is also a Russian Restaurant in Sorry Hills name The Russian Coachman, and one in Bondi name I think or Odessa or Skazka in Masonic Hall in Bondi BYU.and the food is just as good and more.
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