“I’m not allowed to speak for two hours” I tell Mr NQN.
“I’d pay money to see that” he says laughing.
The Silent Dinner Party is an event that I heard about first on Amy’s Cupcakes and Cornrows blog. Part of Sydney’s Fringe Festival it is run by Australian performance artist Honi Ryan who has staged this event all around the world. This is the first time it has been here in Australia and it promises to be an interesting evening. Each Silent Dinner party is held at a secret location in Sydney’s Inner West. There are three silent dinner parties scheduled for the month of September as part of the festival but they’re proving so popular that new dates have had to be added.
The brief was simple:
“Silent Dinner Parties are a normal dinner party, except it is requested that you, the guests:
1. Please don’t use words or your voice
2. Please don’t read or write
3. Try to make as little noise as possible
4. Stay with it for at least 2 hrs
There is no audience, only participants, as we sit around a dinner table in someone’s Sydney home devouring a 3 course feast, you are guaranteed a grand [silent] giggle”.
Could I do it? Could I not utter a word for 2 hours? Mr NQN doubted it and I must admit I doubted myself. We arrive at the Inner West location and there is a collective of people at the door. “Silent dinner party?” one asks us and they are the last words that we utter for the next two and a half hours. As we walk through the house, we nod and smile at people and everyone shakes hands. The effect of not being able to speak is immediate as we cannot rely on other cues of communication and as a result everyone waves at each new guest and smiles broadly. In fact my cheeks ache from smiling so much!
Covering the wine labels
There are a couple of groups of friends and interestingly a couple of people that have come by themselves, including Amy. The first half hour starts off a little awkwardly as people nod and smile at each other amidst much nervous laughter at the somewhat deafening silence. Then someone takes a seasoned seaweed leaf and we all dig in. All of the food in this three course dinner is vegetarian and prepared here by Honi and her friendly team. I’d tell you their names but we aren’t allowed to speak and there are no name tags. In fact when people bring wine and water, the labels are covered over with a white sticker and people wearing logos on their tops also have these covered.
Miming conversation
Conversation is through mime and people try to converse to find out where we’re from and what we do for a living. Amusement and laughter reigns as someone asks a girl if the man she is with is her lover via various hip grinding gestures. It turns out he is her father! There are also un PC gestures where people give which country they come from (I shan’t name names! 
). I try to guess one guest’s occupation-she gestures that her nose is growing longer so I think she means politician but I’m not entirely sure. We ascertain who is together and who is married or engaged. The silence is broken at times by the barking and whimpering of the dog who may just be totally confused at the silence.
Vegetable soup
The first course comes out and it is a zucchini, onion and leek soup blended up until very smooth and served cold with a swirl of goat’s yogurt. It’s quite good and velvety smooth; What is interesting is that everyone acts a little differently because they aren’t allowed to have adult conversation. In Mr NQN’s words (afterwards!) he says “Everyone let their inner child out” by mugging and acting silly. There’s simply no chance to have an adult conversation so you end up playing and acting like children do.
Cherry tomato, spinach, roasted pumpkin, feta and pine nut salad
Beetroot and sesame seed salad
Grilled Portobello mushroom, polenta cake and grilled red capsicum
Vegetable couscous
The mains come out share style and there is a range of three vegetable salads as well as a couscous salad. There is a leaf salad with cherry tomatoes, spinach leaves, cubes of roasted pumpkin, feta and toasted pine nuts. Then there is an avocado, chick pea and tomato salad and a beetroot and sesame seed salad. the couscous is flecked with small pieces of diced eggplant and they bring out the crumbed mushrooms, polenta squares and grilled capsicum, one per person. The salads are nice and varied with lots of good bits and I particularly enjoy the pumpkin and cherry tomato salad, the Chickpea, avocado and tomato salad and the grilled mushroom.
Chickpea, avocado and tomato salad
Wigs…
and hats!
The wigs come out as well as the toys and people play battle with smurfs and Simpsons figurines. Again we end up playing like children in the absence of conversation there are lots of figurines battling each other. On our table, they set up a diorama figure which is pure Halloween. There is also dancing and faux DJing from some of the group who dance to the silence.
Faux DJing
Having fun with figurines
Poached Pear with vanilla ice cream
Dessert comes out and it is a spiced poached pear with a rich Maggie Beer vanilla bean ice cream. The pear is a little soft but the flavours are delicious together and even though everyone is full, all bowls go back clean.
At the strike of 10pm someone lets out a peep of noise. Startled and a few people whisper “Shhh!” but then gradually music fills the room and everyone simultaneously bursts into a stream of talking. We find out what people do and their names. The girl who was attending with her father tells us that her father doesn’t speak any English and that he is from Shanghai so this was the perfect event for him. The other girl did work for a politician after all. Conversation spills forth like a bursting dam and people’s confirm understandings and misunderstandings. It’s all a little surreal being so noisy after such a prolonged period of interactivity with silence.
Was it worth it? Absolutely so, anyone fascinated by fellow humans or human nature would find it a most interesting evening indeed.
So tell me Dear Reader, do you think you could go for two hours without speaking?
The Silent Dinner Party
Part of the Sydney Fringe Festival
To book email honi@hedonics.com.au or call 0413 375 619. The cost is $30 per person.
http://thesydneyfringe.com.au/shows/silent-dinner-parties
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73 Comments | Add your own
Never heard of this event (haha), but I do really doubt I could keep silent that long and I am so bad at miming. My husband would be with Mr NQN – he’d pay well for the silence for a couple of hours.
This sounds like it was such a fun time! I had to laugh out loud when you talk about the hip grinding gestures…too funny! The food is lovely too!
Wow – what an interesting dinner indeed! I would be hopeless at staying quiet for 2 hours! But it sounds like quite a lot of fun though!
What an interesting concept for a dinner party! I think I would find it very hard to be quiet for a whole 2 hours, such is who I am! Must have been fun at the end when you could find out how accurate/inaccurate you were with your guesses though.
There is no way I could stop talking for two hours – unless I was asleep! But you know what, my husband would love this sort of dinner.
Sounds like an interesting evening. I am loving those salads – especially the cous cous and the beetroot salad. I probably couldn’t go without speaking for 2 hours – ooops.
Not a chance. But it looks like great fun, and I’m most impressed that you managed it.
I couldn’t do it. Conversation & food go hand in hand.
How incredibly interesting! I wonder if they do anything like this here in Melbourne. I’d be up for it, and I could chatter for hours on end!
That is wild! I had a colleague who used to attend an annual silent retreat. So for an entire weekend, all the participants said NOTHING at all. She says it’s very peaceful and meditative. I suppose so. But I dunno — one of the most fun things about sharing a meal with someone is having a lively conversation with them. I, for one, would miss that terribly.
I felt so shy, which is weird considering I didn’t have to talk to anyone
Great night though!
oh wow! that would be so challenging for me, but the food looks awesome so I think I could cope!
I am very impressed I am sure I would blurt something out, even if just by accident
Heck no! Like Mr NQN, my bf would love to hear me not talk for that period of time. What a cool concept, it makes you realise the things you take for granted hey?
What an awesome experience! Although I have to admit, I’m surprised you could make it the full two hours – when we get together there isn’t even 2 seconds of silence, hehe!
You find such interesting stuff NQN =) Going to see if they can fit me in. I hope so!
I think i’d find this extremely difficult! The only way i’d manage is to always have food in my mouth!
What a fascinating idea! I think that it would be a really cool way to meet people. Would love to go to one!
Wow, what an interesting little experiment! Love it. lol at the miming conversation
I think I could do it…same as you, though, my man would doubt that i could
Heidi xo
Lorraine, If you could do it, I could do it:) Now, it wouldn’t be easy, but I’m Italian, so I think I could talk with my hands.
What a fun evening.
Hehe, what I really wanted to say was, wow, what a fantastic event! This is right up my street – challenging, fun, and involving food
xxx
Weird…..
But then I’d love to join in…
(Am used to not uttering a word during dinner – am single hehe)
Interesting sure … but not for me Lorraine ….life is too short not to laugh out loud in the company of great food and friends …..
Goodness…how did you manage? I think the only time I don’t talk for two hours is if I’m asleep..
Very interesting concept – would like to try it here at home some nights!! For some people I know this would be utterly impossible.
Couldn’t do it…not talk or even make a noise?? Hell no!
oh wow – that sounds really interesting! I think I would just get the giggles though
That sounds absolutely fascinating… My husband goes to silent Buddhist retreats and has described some of the same experiences, though they were never given toys to play with…
I LOVE this idea! I’m pretty shy anyway so I think this would actually bring me out of my shell more than if I were meeting people normally. Wish we had something like that around here.
What an hilarious concept! I think I could do it… I’ve always liked Charades
(Love the look of the beetroot and sesame salad, too!)
That sounds so interesting! I would love to go to one of these!! (Perfect for my inner actor! LOL)
I must admit, I don’t think I could do a whole vegetarian meal, but what you were served looked nice.
What an interesting concept! I think it would be great fun. You would get to know people in such a new way by changing the dynamic like this. The food looks good too!
I read about this event and tossed up going or not, I decided not, wasn’t sure how I would cope with it. It really sounds like an entertaining night.
Now, that takes the cake as the most unusual dinner party I’ve heard of in ages. I’m not sure if I could manage; I’m quite loud even when I’m not talking! ;p
Wow, I love it. There is a Buddhist retreat near here, on the Sunshine Coast, where you can retreat, but cannot talk. You also cannot kill anything, including mosquitos, which are in abundance. All food is vegetarian, and you sleep in simple single beds, with no air-conditioning. I don’t know if I could hack it, but perhaps a dinner party like you have described, could be a start?
This is so surreal!!! I’ve attended a silent retreat where all you do is pray and meditate but I guess that is still in keeping with being in a “retreat.” But dinner!? With no talking?!? Oh boy. This should be interesting!! Is this only held in Australia? I think I’ll end up eating too much here ;p LOL
This is so surreal!!! I’ve attended a silent retreat where all you do is pray and meditate but I guess that is still in keeping with being in a “retreat.” But dinner!? With no talking?!? Oh boy. This should be interesting!! Is this only held in Australia? I think I’ll end up eating too much here ;p LOL
http://scarletscorpion.blogspot.com
I’m an introvert so not talking comes quite naturally, I’ve gone whole days without talking when my boyfriend is away. Absolute. Bliss.
What a hilarious account – charades and mime to the extreme! I saw the event and wondered whether I could survive it – now that I’ve read your post – it sounds even harder than I thought, but great fun. Great post!
I think this is brilliant! Brilliant having to learn to communicate (in a group, no less) without words or noises and then learning to enjoy the food and share the food experience in ways other than (verbal) language. I would love to go to an event like this. And as you say it is perfect for a group who speak different languages. Down to the basics of communication. The food looks fab too. Great post, Lorraine!
Once would be enough, it does sound like fun though. My husband would do very well, he ususally sits through dinner without saying a word.
I have never heard of this concept and first reaction – no couldn’t do it. But on reading further lots of intrigue and food for thought. Figurines sound strange but dancing to imaginary music a lot of fun.
What a great idea! I would struggle, but I would love it!
Sounds fun. I’d like to not talk or mime and just concentrate on the food and wine.
How restrained you’d have to be to stop yourselves going “mmmmm” when you ate the food! I agree once doing this would be enough. Definitely a memorable one!
I don’t get it. It seems a bit unnecessary?
How interesting! I’m not sure if I can’t shut up for 2 mins! But I still want to do this! I can imagine the chatter after 2 hours! FUN…
I would never be able to do this! Sounds like fun though!
Wow Lorraine a dinner party with a difference…I can’t imagine not saying anything for 2 hours ha ha!!!
Whoever came up with this idea is brilliant! But I probably wouldn’t last long… my mouth can go 1000 miles per hour and I just wouldn’t have any control haha!
ur beautiful an i love ur stuff
This is SOOOOO COOOOL! I totally want to go to a silent dinner party, if nothing else just to challenge myself! You can’t even write so no tweeting!!
I’d love to give this a go! I guess you’d have to make any allergies pretty clear beforehand if you can’t ask questions. Bit hard to call an ambulance if you can’t talk
I would die.
haha.. what an awesome concept! Would love to participate (or organize) a dinner like that. This gives me great inspiration. Thank you Mrs NQN!
Lorraine, what a fun event…love the pictures…but I’d have trouble with mime
I will be doing this kind of dinner party with my fiends soon.
I think it is a great idea as none of them usually
keep their mouth shut!!!
I just have to think what should the penalty be for
saying something!!
What a unique party! You guys must have had fun with the mime language
I’ve been craving silence lately…still can’t figure out why. Therefore, I guess that this type of event would be great for me right now. It looked like a very unique idea.
After the 2 hours…I’m sure, you couldn’t shut me up ;o)
Ciao for now,
Claudia
No talking aye? Sounds like the ultimate dinner for mimes.
Its now perfectly normal to play charades while gnawing on a t bone steak.
I would hate that! And I am not a big talker either. Perhaps it’s because you would have to be fairly ‘out there’ to make yourself understood without talking.
What an interesting (and odd!) concept! I think I could easily go hours without talking – but I’d be sad not being able to say “omg this is so good”.
Kinda a weird & wonderful hey Lorraine. ‘Fraid I wouldn’t be able to keep from talking for that long.
It would be very very hard indeed but my Dad actually believed that conversation during a meal interfered with your digestion so he often didn’t speak even though the rest of us did. As I read your blog I was imagining myself at one trying to mime if there were any nuts or eggs in anything … he he!
What an amazing experience! I would find that totally crazy hard. My hubby on the other hand… easy!
Well done, and looks like you had a fabulous night. I laughed out loud at the grinding lover gesture story! 
This sounds like a really fun and interesting experience. But how did you do it?! Not speak for 2 hours requires skills!
What a fun concept – definitely worth trying even for once.
What a great idea, what an interesting way to interact socially. I would love to try that! I laughed out loud in the office when I read the part about the girl being asked if her father was her lover…that was hilarious!
I’m so intrigued! I would LOVE to attend such an event, and with my husband too:)
I love this idea! You probably enjoy the food more too because you aren’t distracted by talking!
See I am an observer and not a big talker so this would be perfect =D What a fun idea though! Perhaps the next dinner party I organise will be a silent dinner party
Haha I can just imagine all the chatter after the 2 hours of silence.
This is an awesome idea – I’m kind of disappointed I didn’t hear about it early enough to book
Oh well, I have an idea for the next house party…
this wouldn’t be much of a challenge for me–i’m not a big talker, especially when i’m eating–but i can see how it’d be difficult for some. what a neat idea!
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