Did anyone read the recent article in the Wall Street Journal about Why Chinese mothers are better mothers? It was one of those topics that was sent to me by a friend and had me alternately cringing and laughing at the same time. In it the writer Amy Chua purports that raising children “the Chinese mother way” i.e. strictly and expecting better from them does them good in the long term.
The article was of course written to incite comment rather than reflect the tone of the actual book cherry picking the most controversial parts whereas the book discusses the mistakes and regerets that she had and that one of her children rebelled. One thing I remember having a chuckle about was when she tells us some things that her daughters were never allowed to do.
- attend a sleepover
- have a playdate
- be in a school play
- complain about not being in a school play
- watch TV or play computer games
- choose their own extracurricular activities
- get any grade less than an A
- not be the No. 1 student in every subject except gym and drama
- play any instrument other than the piano or violin
- not play the piano or violin
Let me go through that list for me and my parents:
- attend a sleepover (I held and attended lots of sleepovers)
- have a playdate (I definitely had these)
- be in a school play (we didn’t hold school plays, is that an American thing?)
- complain about not being in a school play (I wanted to be in one so I may have complained about the school not holding one)
- watch TV or play computer games (I was allowed to do both although bear in mind a computer game was Pac Man and Space Invaders when I was a kid)
- choose their own extracurricular activities (well apparently food blogging for children hadn’t developed what with the internet not being around so with nothing else at my disposal I was allowed to choose homework)
- get any grade less than an A (well I did really let them down consistently here)
- not be the No. 1 student in every subject except gym and drama (lol again I must have been a huge disappointment although I upheld the Chinese child tradition of failing in gym)
- play any instrument other than the piano or violin (I did a couple of years on the piano but they gave up soon after_i was not going to break out with Rachmaninoff’s Piano Concerto No. 3 in D minor, I was more a Für Elise gal-the abridged aka simple version)
- not play the piano or violin (my lack of talent decided my fate here)
This list was interesting to me because I felt that my parents were incredibly strict with me growing up. Yet from having a look at this list my parents were utter slackers! 
I then spoke to a friend Buxom Wench who told us that her child Clone No. 1 said “Don’t worry, mum, you’re a failed Asian mother, I’m going to get you a t-shirt that says so. On the back it can say, ‘I forgot to ruin my kid’s life”. And she mused aloud and said “Maybe I can wear it to Chinese New Year…hahaha”.
I do recall wishing that my friend’s parents were mine though. Another aspect that my parents were strict was more from my father’s side. He only ate Chinese food so we never got to try anything different for the first decade of our lives unless it was bought from my pocket money or eaten at a friend’s house. I hated it back then, all I wanted was something different but now, if I don’t have Chinese food for a couple of weeks I start to crave it.
These Xiao Long Baos were actually something that we didn’t grow up eating. Instead for us dumplings were the Cantonese yum cha variety. But when my mother asked me what I would like to have to Chinese New Year I suggested these. Both of our interests were peaked at watching them being made at New Shanghai but the restaurant weren’t willing to share their secret recipe so I looked for a recipe and found one at Steamy Kitchen which looked the part. It had the telltale gelatine broth that once steamed, turned into a lovely hot soup to be sipped from the dumpling.
The recipe was quite clear and we just adjusted it to add a little more salt and ginger. I made the dough in the bowl of an electric mixer but of course if you don’t have this you can follow the original recipe’s instructions of mixing it with chopsticks and a bowl. So what was the verdict? Scrumdiddyumptious indeed! They’re a bit of work yes but most of the time is taken up by the jelly broth but considering that it makes about 50-60 dumplings, it’s best made and eaten in a group of hungry, nimble fingered eaters. Good reward for good effort if you will (and doesn’t that make me sound like Amy Chua? 
).
So tell me Dear Reader, what did you think of that article? And were your parents strict when you were growing up?
Xiao Long Bao – Shanghai Soup Dumplings
Adapted from Steamy Kitchen
The Soup
- 2 quarts/2 litres of water
- 2 pounds/900 g chicken bones (wings/back/neck)
- 2 ounces/60 g of Virginia Smithfield ham (or cured Chinese ham if you can get it), cut into 4 pieces (Virginia ham)
- 1/2 pound/250g of pork skin & fat (you can ask your butcher for this, he’ll most likely just give it to you. you could also use pork belly, or just a fatty cut of pork)
- 1 inch piece of ginger, sliced into 4-5 ginger “coins”
- 2 green onions, cut into 3 inch pieces
- 2 large garlic cloves, smashed with side of your knife
- 2 teaspoons of Chinese rice wine (or dry sherry)
- 1 tablespoon powdered Agar Agar or 1 tablespoon of unflavored gelatin
1. Wash pork thoroughly. Take the pork skin and with the backside of your knife, firmly scrape the surface of the skin to clean it further. This will help you produce a cleaner soup. Rinse again. Place all ingredients in a large stockpot. When all ingredients come to a boil, immediately turn to low heat and simmer for 2 hours. Skim surface of impurities constantly to keep soup clean and clear. Or, you could make the broth in half the time. When the soup is done. Strain and discard solids. We will only use 4 cups of broth. (Save the rest for soup!)
2. Place 4 cups of the broth back in the pot, turn on the heat. When just about to boil again, turn heat off and add the agar-agar or gelatin. Whisk for 2 minutes until all powder is dissolved. Pour broth into containers to set. Refrigerate until set, about 3-4 hours.
The Filling
- 1 lb/450 g ground pork
- 1/4 lb/125 g shrimp, shelled, deveined and minced finely
- 3 stalks green onion, finely minced
- 2 teaspoons sugar
- 2 tablespoons soy sauce
- 3 teaspoons salt
- 1/4 teaspoon white pepper
- 2 teaspoons grated fresh ginger
- 1 teaspoon Chinese rice wine (or dry sherry)
- 1/4 teaspoon sesame oil
1. Mix all ingredients. Remember the broth gelatin above? When the broth gelatin is set, run a fork through it, with criss-cross motion, to break up into very small 1/4″ pieces. Take about 2 cups of the gelatinised broth and add that to the filling mixture. Stir to incorporate evenly throughout. Refrigerate until ready to use.
Mom’s Hot Water Dough
(makes about 50-50 dumplings)
- 400 grams of all-purpose flour (but please re-read the part above re: dough)
- 3/4 cups boiling hot water
- 1/4 cup cold water
- 1 tablespoon cooking oil
1. Put 90% of the flour in the mixing bowl of an electric mixer fitted with a paddle attachment. One the lowest speed pour about a third of the hot water in the flour. Add the rest of the hot water until the dough begins to form. Add the cold water and oil. Add the remaining 40 grams of flour and knead on the lowest setting for about 4-5 minutes until the dough becomes elastic. Cover with plastic wrap and let it sit for 30 minutes.
2. Divide the dough into four equal pieces. Take one piece (cover the remaining 3 pieces with plastic wrap) and roll it into a long log, about 1-1/4″ diameter. Using pastry scraper or knife, cut dough into 10-14 pieces. Roll one of the pieces between your palms to get a nice, round, smooth ball. Dust the counter top lightly with flour keep a small pile of flour to the side so keep the surface dry and floured. Roll each ball of dough out into a circle using a small, light rolling pin (I used a cannoli mold which is actually a wooden broomstick cut into pieces) and then using the end of the small rolling pin, roll out the edges so that they are thinner so that there is a thicker circle in the centre.
3. With your left hand (if you are right handed) make a C with your thumb and foirefinger and rest the pastry dics in there. Fill the centre with filling ensuring that you get lots of the gelatine bits. With your thumb and forefinger of your right hand pinch pleat the dumplings together. Cover any dough and made dumplings so that they don’t dry out.
To steam
- 1 head of Napa or wombok cabbage, leaves separated or circles of baking paper
1. Fill steamer with 1 layer of Napa cabbage leaves. Steam over medium heat for 2 minutes to warm up the steamer and to soften cabbage. Place dumplings on the cabbage leaves, leaving 1 1/2″ space between each dumpling. Steam for 12 minutes. Serve in bamboo steamer.
The Dipping Sauce
- a few slices of red chilli
- 1/2 cup black vinegar
- 1/2 cup soy sauce
- 1 teaspoon sesame oil
- 1 tablespoon of shaved ginger
1. Combine all of the above and serve as a dipping sauce and refrigerate until ready for use.
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98 Comments | Add your own
Great dumplings! Really wonderful.
Cheers,
Rosa
Hah! I love the “failed Asian Mom” t-shirt idea, Lorraine! I read the article AND saw her interviewed. My kids (now in their 50′s) all turned out fine…more than fine, and I broke every rule in her list!
Your dumplings are adorable and I love the filling!
wow i cant believe you made this! i was just talking about this dumpling with my sister and tell her how much i was craving for some! does it have a soup like broth in the dumpling once its cooked? i have this bookmarked. thank you so much Lorraine.. and have a great day.
Haha think they should sell those shirts. I’ve always found it interesting about your father only eating Chinese food which you have mentioned before, I wonder if it’s contributed to your love of interesting food and trying new things. Your parent’s definitely did not fail you
Oh dear, and here I thought my parents were strict! I guess the culture is very different in Northern Europe. These dumplings look perfect, by the way!
yes, very strict =( the dumplings look amazing! Bookmarked!
Mmm, duuumplings! They look so delicious. But I don’t know if I can bring myself to make them myself though or maybe it’s just the heat of this week getting to me – the thought of being in an apartment with a boiling pot of stock…
Lorraine, you made shiao long bao? They are my favorite dim sum dish…love these little juicy bao…so tasty and yummie
Nice photos as always.
I think maybe I should start with a more simple dumpling
My daughter is only 3 and I have already let her break a few of those rules!
Woman, you made your own xiao long bao? Amazing…I didn’t think that was possible! Hope you and your fam have a wonderful CNY! That Amy Chua article really was controversial, eh? I can’t tell you how many of my friends felt the need to email it to me..
Scumdiddyumptious indeed! Your photos are exquisite! So detailed and helpful! I love dumplings. the Amy Chuia book was a real big deal for exactly 15 minutes, but she did ger her fame and notoriety, book sales through the roof, water cooler discussions, death threats, everything. if anything, it was a wake up call for me, i saw a lot of her micro-managing traits in me, and I was shamed and horrified.A real wake-up call. i’m waiting patiently for the next 10 years when we’ll see how her kids REALLY turned out.
hmm I wonder if I could adapt these to be gluten free???
These look great Lorraine! I thought my Mum was strict, and always expected a lot from me at school, but in retrospect, I could watch as much TV as I wanted – if I didn’t get my homework done or I did it in front of the telly (which I did reasonably often), too bad. (And I passed with flying colours, so clearly TV deprivation was not essential.)
I much preferred some of the responses – especially “Amy Chua is a Wimp” published in the NYT. It uses the same level of intelligent satire but sums up exactly what I thought when I read her article… e.g. “She’s protecting them from the most intellectually demanding activities because she doesn’t understand what’s cognitively difficult and what isn’t.”
And what more evidence do you need than a hugely successful food writer borne of curiosity, passion and creativity?
Looks pretty good. You must have learnt something from your stint at the dumpling restaurant from your previous post.
P.S. Do you work a normal job, and if so, how do you find the time to blog everyday!
That article is everywhere at the moment! My mum saw it and gloated for about half an hour about her parenting… unfortunately I fit into all of those categories (with the exception that I was allowed to go to sleepovers).
I know it’s not quite dumplings, but I think I shall be trying those Xiao Long Bao’s for Da Nian San Shi!
The article obviously had some merit. My parent’s weren’t particularly strict, but they weren’t particularly communicative about the rules they did have- if I had have understood them I perhaps would have complied! I’m going to be a stricty-pants and I’m sending both of my cherubs to a stricty-pants school!
Wow – two xiao long bao posts in a row!! What a treat!
I might have to gove these a go. Do you think they would freeze ok?
Wow, those look delicious! I’m definitely going to try them soon! (And I think you might mean scRumdiddyumptious?)
I have always suspected that Chinese mothers placed a greater emphasis on education than non Chinese mothers.
What I have observed is that Chinese toddlers and children are better behaved in public than non Chinese children.
I live in an area with a high proportion of recent Chinese migrants and eat in the local Shanghai restaurants quite often; I am always impressed with how well behaved the toddlers are at the table.
I got my love of Oriental food from my Korean Aunt. I have 3 Korean cousins from her and my uncle. The only thing she gave me I didn’t eat was seaweed . I tasted it and it tasted like iodine. But any chance I get to eat Oriental food I will eat it.
I did read that article – which is kinda freaky because I’ve no idea why I came to read it. I’m not sure if my parents were super strict, my Mom taught us herself (yup., I’m a homeschool kid) but before you think ‘uhuh weird religion right’.. WRONG!!! We lived in the middle of nowhere, which is right next door to ‘I’ve no freakin idea’ & so Mom became teacher, which was pretty good because school hours were just 2 hours a day then we got to hang out with horses & Dad & farm life, Mom apparently had an ability to view the school year curriculum in a practical way which always involved visits interstate where we’d “learn” about zoos & Mom got a hit of shopping. All very organised really until the dreaded boarding school age…, but that’s another story for another time
Great effort with the dumplings, they look fantastic. I think with these things, you get better with practice (which is why mine are abysmal!).
These look amazing of course! What perfect dumplings
This looks delicious. I have a good friend from Shanghai who’d love if I made these
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Hi Lorraine,
they look delicous, happy chinese new year !
They look great!
Happy Chinese New Year, Lorraine!
Don’t get me started on that article…
SSG xxx
MY kind of food for the second day running! Thank you, thank you, beautiful lady!
My N European parents were almost as bad as those Chinese ones! I wasn’t made to play an instrument, but absolutely had to aim for those ‘A”s! Which meant only limited sleepovers – boo-hoo!
I went to Dover Heights Girls’ High in the Eastern Suburbs of Sydney – we surely had a huge Playday/Night every year: each class put on a short play and there was the School one – usually one act of Shakespeare. Acting prizes and all!!
Awesome job – how thin did you manage to get the pastry?
Hello the dumplings look delicious as I love cooking yum cha items I will definitely be cooking these. My parents especially my Dad where strict, or so I thought at the time. My Dad can still pull that face that tells you he doesn’t approve, even though I am in my 40′s !!!!
I recently subscribed to your blog and am SO enjoying it! Love your sense of humour and loved the Wall St Journal article and your comments on it. I’ve only just discovered Xiao Long Bao dumplings (at the Hong Tu in Melbourne). They are so yum (don’t think I will be making them though!)
NQN
Thank you for the recipe….I will definitely try this for CNY
perfect timing
Cheers
ST
Very impressive! For a micro-second I thought I might try making them, but got to my senses just in time. Phew! Are you going to make them again?
I had the same ideas as a kid, wishing my friend’s parents were mine!! The dumplings look delicious!
I love the idea of a shirt like that. Hah. My parents were strict with me to a point. For instance, my Mom never let me get pierced ears, join the Girl Scouts or get an Easy Bake oven. Not sure why for the former two, but with the latter, she thought I’d burn the house down. Yes, with a light bulb!! Go figure…
I think it will be interesting to see what Tiger Mom’s daughters grow up to be like. Will they go through a rebellious period? Will they be as strict with their own children when they become mothers, themselves? I’m all for setting boundaries, but I swear, some of those actions mentioned in that excerpt in the Wall St. Journal, sure sound like they border on child abuse. I mean, if someone other than the mother had done some of those things to a child, wouldn’t that person be behind bars now? Definitely makes you wonder.
HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!Ah really gotta try this recipe
. My parents cook the exact same things every year for the celebrations and every time we honour the ancestors. Being part chinese (part cambo) I thought my parents were crazy strict too. I read the article last week and found a few that resonated with me. My parents didnt let me have sleepovers unless with family and playdates unless with family. Also violin and piano was a crucial component in our childhood. Though my mother had thrust me on the piano and my brother on the violin. Both of us ditched it after the age of 10 and chose guitar and drums respectively. I guess as long as my parents saw us acing something that we liked, they didn’t really care 
. Also my brother and I are extremely competitive so we would try and outdo each other on who would get the most A’s and awards lol so my parents didnt have to worry too much there.
You gave me such a dumpling craving yesterday that this morning I went out and bought pork mince for my first attempt at gyoza!
I thought that my parents were pretty strict but looking back I think it was just about the right amount. I wasn’t too keen on wearing knee, elbow and wrist guards as well as a helmet rollerblading though! Again it was probably a good thing as I’m rather lacking in skills for using anything that attaches to my feet.
Love those dumplings and think the work is well justified.
My parents were strict but fair. I like to think I am too. We’re lucky as we’ve got 10yrs between the girls, so if we screwed up first time round, we get another chance! No, they’re both wonderful. I think Amy came to realise that chhildren are all individuals and not a little version of yourself.
yummy!! they look gorgeous =)
Thank you Lorraine – your list made me laugh ever so much! And anyway, I wasn’t allowed to quit the piano (or the clarinet), and my parents are white through and through
Ah, it is hilarious thinking of how different computer games used to be! I was a kid a bit after you so had more that pacman, but my games were still incredibly basic!
I think I’m going to be having a go at this recipe very soon
After reading that article, I actually told my English mother that she could almost pass for a Chinese mother. It was meant in a good way though – she was certainly never *that* strict. The piano practice episode was vaguely familiar though.
My mom does not allow me to attend sleepovers, make sure I go to bed early, set curfews, do not let me hang out with my friends until I was 18 (when I am in Melbourne), make sure that I finish all my homework before watching tv… etc etc.
Yet, I find her nice.
Hehe.
Mmm dumplings. My parents were pretty strict growing up – mainly about boys and dating. I was a pretty good student so they didn’t have too many worries on that side. Definitely no musical talent though – I played the flute for about 2 years and never practiced…for some reason I was never really any good…
Roar of the Tiger Mum! Time will tell how her children will “really” turn out & how many years they will spend on a psychiatrists couch bemoaning their mother’s Nazi regime.Saying that I grew up with strict Italian parents being first generation Australian was difficult.Food was a big thing NO vegimite sandwiches for this wog kid but something that resembled a pine forest arranged on some good Italian giabatta….
I love these little dumplings; they made me very happy when I discovered them in Hong Kong. Sadly, I am far to lazy to make them myself, though.
Beautiful pleating technique Lorraine and yes I had a few chuckles too at the Chinese Mother list ;D
Nice xiao long baozz! Gong Xi Fa Cai!
ohhh so THAT’S how they get the broth inside the dumpling! genius!!
i had a Filipino mother.. does that count? and yeah she was very strict! i wasn’t allowed out on play-dates or sleepovers (unless my Mum had known the other Mum for like.. a million years) and I played piano from age 7-17.. hurray for Asian mothers lol
Uncannily dear Lorraine, you sound like my thankless teen in disguise. No matter how much we let her do {within limits}, she always thinks her peers parents are far better. One day she shall take off those rose tinted glasses, & I will drag her to NQN!! keep these posts coming dahlin’… I ♥ them, and the dumplings too. Perfect!! Happy CNY!!
Your dumplings turned out great! Perfect for CNY. My parents were a little strict – they wasted so much money forcing me to learn piano. And I wish they’d let me have a puppy!
Chinese recipes OR the coda for bringing up beloved kids? Actually, why do the most accomplished ‘foodies’ seem to have had the most demanding Moms/Dads – beloved tho’. I am sure, they restropesctively are/were?! If this was how we grew up – did it hurt us or did we suffer in the long run? Question to the panel?
XIAO LONG BAO! I’ve only ever had these soupy little morsels of goodness once, so I’m not really game enough to try making them yet. I need more experience in eating them!
Great post
Yum!! I learnt to make these while in Hong Kong at the world-renowned Martha Sherpa Cooking School. She is an incredible cook, and a hard taskmaster – she demands perfection!
http://scoffandquaff.wordpress.com/2010/12/14/martha-sherpa-cooking-school-hong-kong/
The only difference with the ones I make, is that I work the pork mince with a stiff hand until it is sticky, then ‘slam’ it into the bowl a few times. Martha taught us that this was the only way to get the pork to proper consistency and create the ‘carnation’ effect (see my blog post http://scoffandquaff.wordpress.com/2011/01/12/hutong-dumpling-bar-melbourne/ ) which is the mark of a good xiao long bao.
Plus, apparently the traditional vinegar is lychee vinegar – dark but slightly less acidic and a more rounded favour than black vinegar.
I’m still looking for it in Sydney though…
Oh – and, Martha insisted to make xiao long bao each dough wrapper must be EXACTLY 6 grams each. That’s not very much dough!!!! They end up incredible thin but very delicate and just like the delicious ones in the best dumpling houses. (Oh and the filling has to be EXACTLY 20 grams!!!)
OMG you rock! These look fantastic. I pigged out on a plateful of these in Ashfield the other day and was wondering how incredibly hard they must be to make.
these look so cute – I have had steamed chinese buns but they had yeast in them so I am not sure if they were the same thing – I laughed when you said your dad would only eat chinese as my dad had to have meat and three veg followed by puddings. Same same but different! I always felt my parents were strict but it is all relative
The pleating is perfect (for me that’s the hardest part) – you just nailed it! Well done – am book marking the recipe.
THANK YOU! I am so looking forward to making these! (Probably dismally failing at first as I’ve never attempted anything like this but you have to start somewhere!) As for strict maternal upbringing, what you learn as you get older is that you are always going to be your mother’s daughter, so get used to it!
I was laughing all through this. Great recipe too – your dumplings look wonderful.
Oh yum! I love dumplings and thank you for the photos showing us how to fold them!
TigerMom forgot to mention 2 things her kids weren’t allowed to do:
1. be a child
2. have fun
One of those articles that were written criticizing TigerMom said that there are a disappropriately high suicide rate (ie higher than the general population) among young American-Chinese adults who grew up in this type of environment.
I used to live in China and teach at a Chinese university. This upbringing may have been typical in China in the past, but in my experience, it certainly isn’t the way most Chinese children are brought up in China today. Since the one child policy came into effect, Chinese children are treated like little emperors and spoilt rotten!
BTW – love XLB – always the first thing I eat when I visit Shanghai!You can’t beat the XLB from the famous restaurant (can’t remember the name) in YuYuan Gardens) – to die for! You really have to visit China and eat your way around the country.
You’ve got those dumplings down pat, girl! Thank you for sharing the technique.
I didn’t see the mentioned article, but I do know that Asian moms are strict in ways that American kids would rebel against. On the other hand,American kids need to learn to respect their elders.That’s hard to do when they teach us big fat lies about Santa Claus, and their discipline is “Do as I say, not as I do”. The fairy tales are scary and the sing-songs are dark, and they tell us we will burn in hell. So we grow up wanting to get as far away from them as is possible. We want the light to shine and they want to put it out.
Happy New Year, I was a strictly self-reared kid, mostly all hands off so any failure in my life is proudly all my own, hehe!
oh myyy you made your own XLB’s! So impressive!! I have to say, my dad was the VERY STRICT kind (mum’s always been cool). No sleepovers, no school camps, no ANYTHING. and I rebelled. big time. but somehow over the years he has chilled so much and is actually a really cool dad now. I cannot believe I would write “really cool dad” in the same sentence about MY DAD, but it’s true. Did the strict upbringing make me a better person? I dont know, but I wouldnt do the same to my kids.
My European parents in Ohio seemed crazy strict compared to my peers’ parents.
I didn’t eat a meal not cooked in our kitchen (aside from the rare school lunch) until I was 13 and my step mother was in the hospital. That was my first taco. I remember it vividly.
You made your own Xiao Long Bao…!!! WOw, thumbs up! They look incredibly yummy!! Happy Chinese New Year btw
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The article had triggered some agitated debate here in Singapore too. The author could have gone a little overboard with the list, but generally, I tend to agree that Chinese/ Asian parents tend to watch their children more closely and are stricter in their parenting approach than their western counter parts…Lorraine,I need to compliment you on your xiaolong bao! I tried several times but they just turn out really ugly!
I have been wanting to make my own dumplings for forever! Yours are beautiful, Lorraine…and truly inspiring!
Interesting article…I also thought my parents were pretty strict, but looking back, I guess maybe they weren’t that bad, lol!
happy chinese new year, lorraine!
i love xiao long bao- just had some the other night from one of my favorite noodle shops in chinatown.
my father was very strict when i was growing up, so when i read amy chua’s article, i did see a lot of parallels. there has been quite a fuss about her here.
They look like perfect little pillows of deliciousness! xoxo Mum
i’m glad you remember your childhood fondly–i think that’s one of the best gifts one could ever be given!
excellent dumpling tutorial.
Oh wow Lorraine, these look wonderful. One day I will attempt making them myself, but for now I will be content with drooling over your pictures!
Those little dumplings look absolutely scrumptious! Yum! I can definitely complain about the point on the piano, i didn’t especially want to play it after a while but my parents insisted
I adore xiao long bao!! I recently went to Shanghai and drove approx 1.5 hrs out to a placed called NanYang where they are famous for their Xiao Long Bao. I think I went though about 2 dozens of them *yes I was starving due to no breakfast and it was almost 2pm* They are made fresh and it is just delicious!! Not as much gingery taste as I dislike it. But I never knew to use gelatin to ensure the broth comes out. Family use uses meat and the juice comes out… Interesting
Regarding the Asian Mother, I have to say that she was a bit over the top. I have an Asian mother as well, and she was strict, but I think I got it easy. I did do alot of those things, but I guess rebellion is also rather awesome. I got to play sport, now I didn’t fail gym until a lot later… *sigh* I need to get my mum the ‘Failed Asian Mum’ as my younger sister is now taking dancing/film/drama lessons at an Art school. What a change from my strictly academic bring up lol
Life is very different in my sleepy world but thankk God i dont feel my parents are strict:-))))
I wont go thru all the list here , what i wanna jump at is the Dumplings.
Im in loveeee with Dumplings these days and find them pretty exciting , infact there is this place that makes lovely dumplings (chicken and veg) and my family n sibblings are always picking it up for me:-)
If i make dumplings and i totally want to , i will be right here for the recipe!
Way to go!
I was always wondering how they got the soup into those dumplings! Looks like a wonderful recipe. We had plays and musicals at our schools.
Wow what an incredibly practised hand you seem to have on the first go, Lorraine! You’re really not put off by any food hurdle are you?
I did not have strict parents (my parents are English Anglo) but I did have unconditional love and what I view as a fairytale childhood (not much in the way of material possessions but lots of free and unsupervised play underscored by healthy discipline and a love of learning instilled in us from an early age). Much better than that draconian approach in my book!
They look wonderful and remind me of childhood ‘cooking time’ with my father
having fun making har gao and other asian treats!
Oh and if it makes you feel better, we attended the same high school and even though I went probably a decade after you, there were still no school plays!
yummm it look sooo delicious
and not hard to make like i thought it would be-
have to make these!
Thanks for the pictures ans tips
Happy new year!!
I had these the other day, but of course not home made. I never actually thought of making them at home, the folding of the dough on top always kind of scared me. Maybe it’s time to try it once I get back to Melbourne. 
My parents were very strict, as most Asian parents were. I wasn’t allowed to sleep over, in fact, when I was in high school, I wasn’t allowed to stay out past 9pm. The curfew started to relax a bit as I grew older. Marks had to be of course, crazily high and my family friends were always used to compare with me. That is the sad life of an Asian child. I thank them now though, since without the strictness I probably wouldn’t be where I am today.
Those are the best looking homemade ones I’ve ever come across! Your pleats are beautiful!
Happy Chinese New Year!
Great job making these tasty morsels. I must try the broth gelatin for my gyoza dumplings next time!
I read that article about Chinese Mothers and found it really really interesting. Where I grew up I was the only ‘Skippy the bush kangaroo’ as they called me, the rest of the families were from assorted Asian countries and Greek. I saw a lot of the ‘Chinese mother’ in the Asian kids families (but hanging out at their house after school was OK – no sleepovers
) and the Greek kids parents were very VERY strict about going to Greek school on the weekends and ensuring that the Greek homework was a priority.
Thanks for the story about your family, it made me smile and remember friends of my childhood.
I would say a lot of those things apply to immigrant families in general. My mother (we’re Hispanic) wouldn’t dream of letting a child of hers partake in a sleepover. But no, she was nowhere near that strict. I can’t recall her really pressuring me to have perfect grades, even if I felt that pressure. I’d say most immigrant parents are more strict. It’s that need to prove that you’re a worthwhile member of the society you’ve chosen to join.
Just sent my Authentic Chinese cookbook to printer and have seen proof today! We have a recipe for these…yours look lovely! (The folding is a killer!)
hmm, i read the article – and i have seen a lot of this in practice, being engaged to a 1/2 chinese man. some of it i understand but some of it i do not agree with, personally. i dislike the whole ‘obeying’ aspect, as if you owe them everything. and i also dislike the no sleepover thing (frankly i do not get it at all) – just my opinion though. i am not saying my way is the right way.
i LOVE xiai long bao though, & loved this post. thanks for the recipe! I cant wait to make my own
Heidi xo
They look fantastic Lorraine! And the Amy Chua article is very interesting – I have to say, I read the list and thought “what’s a playdate?”. Clearly, I didn’t get one.
I decided to make these on Valentines Day with my wife who is Chinese. Some how other Chinese people in the neighborhood came by to help. I thought we were set! They tasted great but the soup disappeared. What happened? I spent a few sleepless nights trying to figure it out and then I thought I had it. Maybe the dumplings weren’t sealed and the soup steamed away or there was not enough of the soup jewels in the dumpling. I tried again and this time I made sure they were sealed and added more soup. How disappointed I was when the soup was gone again. Does anyone have any idea my dumplings would have lost the soup?
Excellent! After a visit to New Shanghai today, I finally got off my backside to find out how they manage the soup in the xiao long bao, and up popped your post on my search. Thanks!
Mmm, they look good – much better than mine! I took a xiaolongbao class in Shanghai recently and was all fingers and thumbs when trying to do the folds. The final result was OK though – read about my experience on the China Travel Blog! Keep up the good work!!
I wasn’t allowed to do 30% of the Chinese Mum “Not to Do” list:) Plus a few more:-
1) No wearing of all black or all blue clothing (top & bottom)
2) No bicycle riding
3) No going out with friends
4) No camping, no sleeping in tent
Needless to say for years after I moved out for college, my closet consisted only of black clothing! Took me years to figure out I look horrid instead of elegant in black.
Also I did sneak out with friends. For Christ’s sake it was only to go to the movies and shopping with girlfriends.
Can’t believe that some commentators are alright with such Nazi Asian Mum behaviour…
Fantastic tutorial! I was just thinking of doing a little DIY since I was craving XLB. (Mmm…)
I chuckled when I read Amy Chua’s article on Asian mothers, though not for it being ridiculous but familiar. Coming from an Asian background, such rules are a common part of my life(not so much on being able to play the piano/violin though…). It sets a certain boundary between what is expected of you and what’s not.
Though I admit that I pretty much broke all the rules, due to my rebellious streak and all. ^^ But my mother was cool with that after a while when she realised that I could manage myself well. (and that I will keep rebelling unless I learn it the hard way…)
I’ve seen kids of overprotective&/strict mums grow up to be unable to handle real world situations, though there are exceptions… There is no magic formula for parenting, the trick is to strike a balance.
Thanks for recipe! Tried it and they were magic! Kids fought over them. I did take note to add less salt to filling, roll the dough not too thinly (or else…pop!), added all 4 cups jelly to filling (not 2),dipped the dumplings in oil before steaming directly on metal steamer. Dough was a little hard after steaming, perhaps add more oil next time??
Thank you for sharing the recipe, it is very thorough. We made these and shared with friends. They were amazing, much better than I expected given it was our first time. We were blown away!
I do wonder if they are freezeable. Any idea? Thanks!
Hi Andrea! I’m so glad that you liked these and the recipe!
I think that if you froze them, just be careful to separate them because if the skin sticks together and tears, then all of the lovely soup comes out 
Lorraine, I just made these dumplings steamed with some Chinese broccoli and they were absolutely amazing! Such a great recipe! Many, many thanks! Love your work! Xx
Going to post them on my blog soon (with credits to your recipe of course) 
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[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by NotQuiteNigella and New Shanghai, Ivy Manning. Ivy Manning said: Heh @GoodStuffNW and all you XLB lovers out there, here's a recipe from @NotQuiteNigella http://tinyurl.com/4q5h938 [...]
[...] excuse possible not to try. On the same day, in the morning I read about Not Quite Nigella‘s dumpling making and in the afternoon I was with my mum and she had to make a detour via the Asian grocer. I [...]
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