Dear Reader, ever wondered what one of my travel itineraries look like? Here’s a peek!

7am Wake up
7-11am Catch up on work and writing
11am Get ready for ferry to MONA (museum of old and new art)
11.40am Ask for directions to MONA wharf from hotel staff
11.50am Realise that I am lost and ask about half a dozen people how on earth to get to the ferry
12pm Just make it onto the ferry when the hand passes 12noon only to realise that the ferry doesn’t leave on time and that I have probably instantly pegged myself as a “mainlander” because I’ve run onto the ferry like my legs were on fire!

“I had nightmares after I visited MONA a fellow traveller said to me. Another said she was greeted on one floor with a wall of vaginas. Errrm what? Yes a wall of 150 casts of vaginas (I never thought I’d ever write that on this blog). It’s one of their many, many controversial art works at MONA. As I absolutely adore modern art I didn’t think I would exactly be having nightmares over it but I was curious to see what It would be like. MONA has been called a “subversive Disneyland” and sits on an eight acre peninsula that curves into the Derwent River.

I alight the ferry and see a huge flight of stairs up top of the entrance to MONA that serves to work up an appetite. The actual museum is housed on three floors below on basement levels of a heritage building and has attracted considerable interest not just because of the controversial nature of modern art.

He explains that owner David Walsh is a big fan of tennis and when he is in town he visits the museum every day. Walsh is an interesting person famous for being mysterious and enigmatic. He is a mathematical genius that made his fortune through gambling and started by counting cards at Blackjack. MONA and its corresponding restaurant, cafe, winery, cellar door, wine bar and museum is his own vision. And does he ever play tennis on Hess courts during the day I ask Andrew? “Well you never know with David!”.

But before we get to the vaginas (again never thought that I’d write that either), we are going for lunch at MONA’s main restaurant The Source. Named after the famous painting by John Olsen of the same name it is a restaurant helmed by chef Philippe Leban. The menu is modern French with an emphasis on seafood. I have a glass of the sparkling to start with. It’s a Moorilla Muse vintage brut 2006 and the wine bottle labels in themselves are talking points. They photographed performers from the Ballet Lab and put these unfolding black and white photos on the labels which gives them a definite sensual quality.

Wine bottles with photographs of Ballet Lab performers

Bread with seaweed butter

All of the bread is baked here and comes with regular butter or seaweed butter. I like the seaweed butter with the baguette which gives it a little extra saltiness from the seaweed.

Lightly poached bug tail, translucent radish, rosemary, Ginger, lime and ikuve oil dressing $25 served with a Muse Pinot Gris 2008

You know that the food just has to be beautifully presented at a restaurant for a museum slash art gallery. This has succulent tender pieces of poached bug tail covered with overlapped, paper thin, translucent radish slices and topped with swirls and splodges of a ginger, lime and olive oil dressing which gives it an Asian flavour. The beautifully cooked bug and delicate radishes and dressing are a perfect symphony and it is light and beautiful.

Abalone, vongole, oyster, periwinkle, parsley jus, smoked oyster oil, sea foam $27

The seafood here is gently cooked and soft and delicately flavored. I only tried a little of this but it is lovely with a creamy parsley jus and sea foam. I know foam is said to be over as a trend but it kind of fits as sea foam.

Roast duck, black pudding croquette, apple sherbet, foie gras, spice bread $42 served with a Pinot noir muse 08

The roast duck comes as a four part dish. The apple sherbet resembles a pommes puree but is a slightly tart apple puree and there is a slender, succulent piece of duck, a crispy skinned piece of duck meat and a slice of seared foie gras and a baton of black pudding croquette. I wasn’t quite sure where the spice bread came into it, the croquette didn’t taste particularly of a spice bread coating. Each component is lovely itself but the gentle interplay of textures from the soft foie gras and crunchy croquette to the tanginess of sherbert with the unctuousness of the duck make this a keeper.

Red snapper, oyster coat, shiitake, kombu, smoked bacon pot au feu $4

The broth for this is poured at the table and I try a little of the fish with small pea size balls of tender carrot and it melts in my mouth. The key to cooking the fish like this according to sous chef Vince is the induction stove which sits pride of place by the pass in the centre of the room. I watch as they sponge it off and squeegee it clean and he tells us that it allows them to control the temperature so precisely on a piece of fish like this with even cooking all over. And you can tell it cost a bomb-the price of a house apparently!

The induction stove

Cherries, Red cabbage sorbet $15

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I take eating quite seriously. What I mean by that is that should you ever try and skip a meal past me there will be howls of protestation and anxious pawing. There will be a severe loss of concentration and my mind will wander. I may even look at you like you might be a tasty morsel to eat.

Wine tasting is all very fine but for me, wine is infinitely more enjoyable when it is combined with food. And today when we’re in the climatically chilly area of Strahan in Tasmania (an opposing force to Sydney’s 35-40C humidity at the time), we are settled down to partake of a little wine and cheese matching.

Rebecca who is holding the cheese and wine tasting is lovely. There are two cheeses from King Island cheese and the rest are the Ashmore cheeses which are produced in Tasmania. Some of the matches were absolutely sublime, particularly the King Island Cape Wickam double brie and the Tamar Ridge Chardonnay and the dessert wine and cheese combination of Frogmore Creek Iced Riesling with the King Island Roaring 40′s blue whilst some of them matched less so. Some of the journalists that I travelled with made loud objections to one match.

A little while later we help ourselves to the Strahan Village buffet. I’m not a huge buffet gal but a seafood buffet, well that’s an entirely different creature you do see. There are fresh Tasmanian oysters, ocean trout, smoked salmon as well as a crumbed fish. There is even a scallop waldorf salad! Sadly every time I tried to get a shot of the display it looked a bit depleted despite the fact that they were refilling it in a timely manner. A half helped to buffet makes for some not so pretty pics.

A 2007 Goaty Hills Riesling

But dinner is had quickly as we have other plans later tonight. I have a bit of a thing for lighthouses. I always think that they look so magnificent and unlike a half eaten buffet display, are very photogenic. And tonight we are headed to Bonnet Island for some little penguin watching. We board the boat and head towards Hell’s Gate which conjures up all sorts of images.

Yes another lighthouse-I must have a fetish…

Our well informed guide Kath takes us through the history of the area and imparts on us the legends of the lighthouse keepers. I don’t want to ruin the surprise should you want to take the tour yourselves but the story of the longest serving lighthouse keeper is an interesting one. OK I’ll tell you because saying something like that is like saying that you know a secret but won’t tell, it’s annoying!

The lighthouse has a series of lamps that needed to be lit manually and burned 600ml of oil every hour so they needed frequent refilling. Failure to light these on time would result in instant dismissal for the lighthouse keeper. The lighthouse inspector lived across the water on the main island and would watch the lighthouse keeper with keen interest ensuring that he did his job.

One lighthouse keeper lived there by himself for a number of years and had quite a few provisions sent to him. He grew increasingly bored on this small island by himself (amusingly they sent him a dining table that seated six people) and bored with the same sort of food to eat he sought to go fishing one evening. He rowed out a little too far and when a passing ship’s captain reported that there was no light the inspector was alerted. The lighthouse keeper rowed back quickly hoping that  he wasn’t spotted but the next morning the inspector rowed up to the island and dismissed the lighthouse keeper after his service of many years. There were no second chances as a lighthouse keeper as the possibilities for failing to do their job could be catastrophic.

We make our way around the island while the sun is setting and then climb back onto the boat for drinks and cheese, dips and crackers. Once darkness falls, we take our red coloured torches which are gentler on the little penguin’s eyes and do our best penguin spotting. They’re tame and curious and not scared of humans at all and come right up to us. They also have sharp beaks for beware!

The next morning we rise to the sight of…ducks on the main road? Yes apparently this happens every morning in the quaint village of Strahan. I don’t often partake of hotel breakfasts. I’m usually still digesting the meal from the evening before but you know what was calling me don’t you? Scallop pies!

Tim from Petuna buys us each a pie from Banjo’s bakery of our choice-I mean what better way to wake up than with a Tasmanian Spring Bay scallop pie. I know you’re curious as to what it’s like inside…

But I need to show you the top first-of course it has a map of Tasmania.

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