What do Justin Bieber and Bono have in common? Well apparently they’ve all taken in the view I am looking at right now. No it’s not of a stadium full of screaming fans but instead the surrealy beautiful blue water of Whale Beach. Whale Beach or Palm Beach is the playground of the moneyed and if you’re fortunate enough you might have a house to go to on the weekend up here-or you could just stay for a weekend at Jonah’s.  And I am about to cut traffic time by engaging in a mode of transport that ensures that instead of driving 50 minutes from the East to the far North, we make it there in a mere 12 minutes.

The day is gloriously sunny and we lucked out with the weather for only yesterday it was whipping windily and the seaplane flights were grounded. However today it is still windy but safe to fly out. We were warned to wear flat shoes to make getting on and off the plane easier and I am glad that I heeded the warning. I’m one person that is poorly coordinated at the best of times (I am always warning Mr NQN not to fall on things and he just looks at me like “How/why would I fall on that?). So I gingerly get onto the seaplane with my handbag and camera bag and breathe a sigh of relief as I miss having to use the folded up life jacket that we’ve strapped around our waist. I’m definitely not coordinated enough for that.

They close the door and we’re enclosed in the plane and it skims along the surface of the water until reaching a speed where the seaplane takes off into the air. The short ride is scenic but with the winds and the air pockets there are lots of tiny jumps and our stomachs are somersaulting. I’m thankful I didn’t eat breakfast that morning as my stomach continues to leapfrog and jump.

The seaplane turns smoothly to its right almost at a 45 degree angle and we land on the water. From here a small dinghy from Jonah’s will collect us and drop us at the sandy beach and from there we’ll take a minibus. Ok so it’s not exactly 12 minutes in total but it’s scenic. Our feet arrive on the sandy beach and again I am thankful I didn’t wear spindly heels. We board the  bus and take the short five minute drive up to Jonah’s.

Jonah’s is set in an 82 year old house and comprises of 11 suites, 3 of which are located in a separate building called “Jonah’s Private” and is one of the four well regarded Relais & Chateaux properties in Australia. From Monday to Thursday diners can stay with them with just the room but from Friday to Sunday they have breakfast, lunch and dinner included in the tariff. And when we gaze into the blue waters below we are reminded why it is called Whale Beach as they tell us that whales were spotted only this morning frolicking in the water below ( from May onwards is the Southern whale migration). A pair of dolphins are our current companions down below diving and splashing.

Chef Alfonso Alés

As we have a seaplane booked to take us back at 2:30pm we pull our eyes away from the expansive blue view and take our seats. Jonah’s now has a new chef, Alfonso Alés who has worked at Spain’s El Bulli and Bilson’s here in Sydney and he comes out to say hello and explains his style of cuisine which will remain Modern Australian but of course be influenced by his Spanish upbringing.

Oyster gratin

The amuse bouche is a crunchy buttery topped oyster gratin which slides down the throat easily with a little crunchy edge for texture. It is briney with a creamy layer of cauliflower underneath it.

Marron Lobster, Western Australia, Green lentils cassoulet with duck confit and foie gras $35 served with 2009 Giaconda “Aeolia” Roussanne/Marsanne, Beechworth, Vic

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“Where are we?” I ask Mr NQN breathless, holding an umbrella and standing in front of a fuzzy grey rain soaked day.

“Don’t worry, follow me” he says taking my hand and guiding me through throngs of bushes and greenery. The greenery is of course because we are in the Royal Botanic Gardens in the middle of the city and the lost is because…well I am me and I could get lost in a square room if I were distracted enough by interesting things. And here there are cockatoos, ibises and a plover bird that is staring me down like I were in a boxing ring with him. Better keep walking!

We arrive at the Botanic Gardens restaurant somewhere (and I suspect the breadcrumbs that I’ve left have been eaten by the pesky birdies) in the parklands (tip for the directionless like me: look for the Palm Grove Centre and Visitor Info sign). I recall coming here for a friend’s pre wedding lunch and it was a lovely setting. Today however things are all set up for Winter and there’s a fire roaring, blankets on the back of our chairs and for the months of June to August there’s a Sunday roast on the menu. The balcony area is covered off with the plastic sails occasionally billowing when the huge gusts of wind take hold.

Bread olives, house made dip $7.50

We’re waiting for a while for the bread which we asked to come first. Even though I am a reasonably patient person, the 25 minutes was a little too long and I was about to ask where the bread was when our entrees arrived. We had to ask where our bread was and this was brought within a few minutes but we couldn’t help thinking that the bread should have come earlier as requested to help fill up that yawning 25 minute gap. The house made dip is a caponata dip which is always a favourite of mine made with tomato, eggplant, onion and capers. It’s very moreish and goes quickly with the three large soft, warmed pieces of bread. There are also some lovely black olives and a bitterish olive oil and balsamic vinegar.

Fish soup rouille, croutons $14

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Going to a wine bar and not having any wine might seem like a silly thing to do but allow me to plead my case. This wine bar, The Wine Library on the Woollahra end of Oxford Street reportedly has some very good morsels to eat on offer. These delicious sounding bites also come at some very reasonable prices too  – and Woollahra is not an area known for value particularly in boutique shopping or property prices! I was also on the verge of a cold so I say no to a glass of wine which I know is kind of like going to a steak house and not ordering steak but sometimes a girl just wants to eat. My buddy The Second Wife reports being very pleased with the wines that she had. And this post is a combination of two visits, the first with the fabulous The Second Wife and the second with  the lovely Petrina from Donna Hay.

And where is the kitchen? Well it is right behind the bar! The open kitchen where food is prepared is a tiny area and the chefs tells the other customer about how different it is cooking out here whereas in a kitchen they never see much action. Case in point, a tipsy customer comes up to the chef and complains about the toilet door loudly and then lurches back to her seat. The chef look bemused by it all.

“Hmm chicken baguette with fennel pollen mayonnaise” I say drooling. The Second Wife, who it must be said is the perfect partner in crime ( we can get up to so much food mischief!) readily agrees to both the lobster roll and the chicken baguette, a serve of sweet potato chips and a witlof salad.

Chicken baguette with celery and fennel pollen mayonnaise $10

We start with the chicken baguette which has been cut in half for us. It is generously filled with tender chicken and mayonnaise and the bread is a white sourdough baguette. I end up eating the filling out of this as the bread is quite thick.

Lobster roll $15

The lobster roll is next. It is filled with tiny morsels of real lobster meat. It’s not bad but I think I prefer the chicken roll more as the lobster morsels are very small and appear to be more of the leg meat than the larger tail meat. Unusually, there isn’t the fennel pollen mayonnaise on this, it tastes like regular mayonnaise here. We check the menu and indeed, this one is supposed to have the fennel pollen mayo but the other one does. In between visits the price has gone up a few dollars from $12 to $15.

Sweet potato chips $5

The sweet potato chips are well salted and paper thin and crispy and very good and moreish!

Witlof salad $9

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